Our Appetizer.: Slowly getting back into it...

April 19, 2014

Slowly getting back into it...

This might be the longest post that you will ever read on this blog or any blog 
but I hope you read all, if not most, of what I have to say 
because it all holds near and dear to my heart 
and maybe some of you have gone through something like this before.

Life Recently - 
Man oh man, where do I begin? I would love to tell you that I haven't been blogging because I've been busy enjoying life, traveling or planning a wedding but the truth of the matter is I haven't been blogging because I'm heartbroken. That word is so much harder to see on paper screen than to actually say it. Whenever I say that word it just flies into the wind but when I type it, it's embedded on this page forever.

Ionut and I came to the conclusion that if neither one of us want to move there is no point to continue. Ionut is the man behind this blog, he is was My Guy. It's hard because I always prayed for him to come back to Cleveland. But I know he always prayed for me to move to Florida. I don't want to rehash what happened between him and I because I don't think my heart can handle it right now. Being alone is scary, being with someone else makes me sick to my stomach and even more, thinking about him with someone else is a feeling that is indescribable. He was it, he was mine, I was his, I was supposed to be his wife and he was supposed to be my husband. But life has a funny way of working out and putting other things first. Yes we both might seen selfish but if you understood our backgrounds/personalities you would understand why neither of us want to give in and move. 

Oh goodness, I'm getting emotional just typing this. Ok I'm done talking about that. Long and painful story made short and a little more bearable...we chose different paths.

Moving out - 
One thing that I've been wanting to do is move out on my own. It's so hard to understand that I need to focus on only myself and my needs now but I'll get there. I started looking at apartments and I found one I really like. Well I like the apartment complex, the location of the actual apartment is perfect only thing standing in my way is the fact that someone still lives there. The guy moves out April 30th and I want to be the one moving in once he moves out. I think I'm going to go put my deposit on the apartment so no one else can take it, because with my luck someone will get it before I can go look at it.  Or I kind of just want to go knock on the guys door and ask him if I can have a quick look around.
I'm really excited and nervous to move out on my own. I think I really need to see what I'm capable of doing on my own. 

Something I've always wanted to do was do a wine tasting/tour. Last weekend I got a few close girl friends together to go with me to Canton's Gervasi Vineyards for a girls day trip. I really needed a pick me up after everything going on and Ionut being on a cruise for a bachelor party just had me thinking all kinds of none sense. Let me try to explain to you how amazing this place way. This place was out of this world, so relaxing and just had such a beautiful vibe. 
#selfies on the way to Canton
Snacks on the way 
And we are here!!

Enjoyed some wine while we toured

One of the coolest sinks I've ever seen
#selfies while we tour
A little blurry but that's ok
In the tasting room


Cheers to good friends
amazing appetizer
Everyone's dinner was mouthwatering
Let's sit around, chat and enjoy great wine.
Of course we had to have dessert.
Messing around on Lavi's phone while she was in the bathroom.
this place was beautiful
I definitely want to stay here one night.
It was a trip much needed to a place I've really wanted to go.

This Blog - 
I started this blog to be able to capture mine and Ionut's relationship growing into a hopeful marriage. It was about him and I starting a life together, about being able to document everything and anything we did together or apart. Now, I'm not sure what course I want to take with it. I'm thinking about just keeping it a Lifestyle blog about life in general. My biggest problem is the name, Boarding Together came because of two people boarding together in life. Now I'm alone and I don't know what to name it. Do you have any suggestions?

Recent posts -  
My recent posts have been a reflection of my life the past two weeks. Yes, I haven't posted and that is mostly because I don't know what to say because I'm speechless and because I'm not sure of the direction I want to go with this blog anymore. I guess I should explain what I mean...

The post titled How To Deal - Lover Moves Away was meant to get things off my chest with how things played out with Ionut and I when he decided to move away. I wrote the post as I remembered how things happened. Of course it wasn't the whole story about how I promised him that I would move down there to be with him and what not because the post was only about when he moved away. If you go to the post, you can see where he commented on it. Some of the things he said were true some were a little grey but that's ok. I would think most people wouldn't publish a comment like that but I have nothing to hide. 

I used the post 32 Things That Make Me Happy to focus on me and only me. With everything going on in my life I needed to focus on the positives. So I jumped on the bandwagon with everyone else and wrote that post. I swear that link-up was an act of God because it really forced me to focus on some positives. 

And my last post Wednesday = Me Time was where I said that I need to take some me time. Mostly because I didn't know what to do with myself mentally, physically and even spiritually. The day I wrote that post Ionut and I hadn't talked for about 4 days and it was hard....it's still hard. I also took time to figure out in what direction I want to take this blog. 

Did you read the whole post? 
If you didn't it's ok, but I hope you read some of it.
Have you gone through a hard breakup?<-- I hate that word.
How do you bring yourself up when you're down?
What do you think I should name my blog?
How has life been treating you lately?


  1. Oh sweet girl.. I have been there too :( It's so hard but ulimately you guys had to make the best decisions you could for yourselves, even if it isn't ideal. I'm so sorry you're hurting. This won't last forever. <3 HUGS!

  2. So sorry to hear your news. I know right now nothing people say will make things easier but just take it one day at a time!

    1. Thanks girl, this means a lot. I think time will tell and heal all. I just have to keep myself busy.

  3. I did read your whole post and hon, I don't know about you but I believe that everything happens for a reason. I say good for you for sticking up for yourself and not moving just for him and leaving your life behind. You know how strong you are for doing that?? I can only imagine what kind of heartache you're experiencing, but in time you'll move on and realize that you made the right decision.

    1. Thanks for reading the whole thing, I know it was long. I do agree that everything happens for a reason, I just don't know that this reason is. It's so hard to know that I made the right choice, it's almost impossible to know which way is best...either I stay here or I go there. Time will tell what needs to happen. Thanks for the kind words :)

  4. i say use this blog as a way to focus on the good things in your life and all the good things that are to come with your new adventure even if it wasn't what you thought would happen :)

    1. Thanks girl! I'm trying really hard to focus on the positive but sometimes it just gets hard.

  5. I read your entire post and what your going through is difficult but I truly believe everything happens for a reason. Keep your head up and try to stay positive.

    1. First of all, thank you for reading the entire thing...it really means a lot. Second of all, thank you so much for the kind words. I'm trying to stay as positive as I can.

  6. Oh girl- big hugs. I know it can't be easy. But definitely take some time for YOU!

    Also- Gervasi looks gorgeous! I've been wanting to go check it out!!

    1. Thanks!!! Gervasi is amazing, I highly recommend it.

  7. Sorry to hear about the guy. I think visiting the vineyard with friends, drink and good food was a great way to cheer yourself up. Good luck with getting your own place! That's probably a good idea to start focusing more on yourself.

    1. Thanks Emily! I'm really looking forward to getting my own place and focusing on myself and what I want. I've been wanting to move out but I've been waiting for him so now it's my time.

  8. just read this post and am sending you LOTS of good vibes. one day you'll be able to look back and smile at how far you've come...which sounds crazy right now...but you can do it!!! keep focusing on the positive and use the blog as an outlet for ALL sorts of emotions...the good and the bad :) i know you'll find the perfect name soon enough :)

    1. Thanks Meagan! Your kind words really mean a lot. I'm trying to focus on my life, work, and this blog. I'm just having a hard time finding inspiration to write.

  9. Oh Alisia, I'm so sorry. I admire how honest you are in this post, and trust me, things will get easier with time. If you need someone to talk to, I'm happy to listen! :)

    1. Thanks Ashley! I really needed to put it all out there just to have a weight lifted off of my shoulders. maybe with time I'll be able to explain the whole story, right now I'm just not emotionally stable to.

  10. Oh gosh, I can't even imagine what you are going through! I never had a truly serious relationship until the one I'm in now and I would be completely lost without Mike. I am so sorry you are going through this! If you ever need anything - let me know! I'm here for you :)

    I definitely agree that taking time for yourself is the best thing you can do right now, and living alone really tests you and makes you grow up a bit. You have to handle everything - no parents to cook dinner, do laundry. It's intimidating at first, but once you get used to it... it's actually so amazing. Pure freedom :)

    That winery looks like so much fun! I need to go to one again soon.

    I wouldn't stress too much about your blog name at the moment. I know it probably reminds you of everything but you have other things to focus on. It took me a couple of months to come up with a new name for my blog when I decided to change mine, and one day it just came to me and it was perfect. So I think that'll happen to you to. Make it personal, about you... since, you know, it's YOUR blog haha :)

    1. This is probably the most heartfelt and genuine comment I've ever read. I need to take things one day at a time and just focus on the things that are going well in my life.